So.... what can I do? Where can I go?

I can't go to most pubs or clubs because they are full of townies or chavs or wankers.

I can't go to goth clubs because I'm sick of those people.

I can't be with my family because they generally squash my expression and emotions, whatever's left of it anyhow.

I can't go onto any spiritual forums to talk about spiritual stuff, cos they are full of the nastiest wankers, you'd find nicer people on an anal-goat-rape forum. Yeah I know you'd expect "spiritual people" to be honest and open and nice, but it's not true, at least not on this planet.

Oh wait, I can find some people who are being honest on the internet! But they are being honest about boring things. Like electronic circuitry or code. GREAT! So people manage to be honest only when it comes to boring things. Meaning there's nothing exciting and fun that people are being honest about.

I can't play WoW because it's ugly, and anti-male, what with making all the male characters big ugly brutes and only making the female characters nice looking. And WoW doesn't make me happy to play solo quests. And as for making friends there... forget it. I had one friend on WoW, and she's gone, she left and hasn't come back in 4 months. The rest are just acquaintances, people who don't listen or care or take me seriously.

I tried looking for better looking online games to play, where they don't make the males into ugly things but make the females look nice (fucking anti-male wankers). The only ones I found were not well made, full of bugs, crappy camera controls, and the people playing them were total assholes, far worse than in WoW.

I can't watch Avatar again, because I re-watched it 3x already. Pretty much with all the things I don't hate, I've rewatched them so many times there's no fun left in them anymore.

I can't do parkour anymore, cos the only group I found that was "open" (accepting newcomers who didn't know much parkour), made me feel uncomfortable for just being me. They were sort of annoying 16 year old kids who had an issue with good looking intelligent eccentric boys like me. Especially boys like me who don't want to be all cavemanly and like refinement. I left after some wanker asked me if I was gay. Cos I'm not and have never been and will never be. So I don't see why he even needed to ask that question. Asshole.

Oh... I can't find a girlfriend, cos women are evil. haha. And the few nice girls have been taken, long long ago. Well I can find a girlfriend. I just can't survive a girlfriend. "I can't find a girlfriend" is code for "I can't find a girlfriend who I can bear", but you knew that.

There's no nature left to explore near me, cos humans have destroyed it all, and placed ugly houses, roads, and golf fields over it. And they polluted the brook near me, it's full of soap and shit now. I still go on walks through the local "woods", but it's not a woods, it's just a pathway with like 4 meters of trees on either side, and that polluted brook. They cut the rest away.

So basically... people have managed to fuck everything up for me. Despite that I don't do anything wrong and make everything good. There's nothing left to do. Apart from cleaning, exercise, inventing, and sleeping... crying...

Oh wait, I can't cry either. I did that for enough years when I was around 18-20, and nothing got better. No one cared. No one listened. Only making an effort made things better for me. Maybe if I was female people would listen to my tears. But I don't want to be female, especially not just to get people to listen to me. I don't even have time to cry anymore. I have so much to do. And no one to help me to do it. Despite that they too would be better off if they helped me. Crying's only of use if anyone listens to your tears, apart from that it's a fucking waste of time. And if we live in a matriarchal anti-male world where only female tears are supposed to have any meaning, why bother crying?

I wish all those fucking "lower beings" as I call them, would die. Those typical humans.

I hate this world. I wish it would burn.